My Punishment for Losing You.

I spoke with B. last week. Her grandson is now living with her. The state decided it was best for all involved if he not live with his mother at this time. It isn’t that she doesn’t love him but her love of heroin is stronger.

I am going up Tuesday to golf with my paternal uncle or ”the other side of the equation” as we call it. After lunch, I am headed over to B.’s and she asked me to stay over. I was planning on it until I found out my dog is having surgery that day. She has a weird little bump on her elbow that needs to come off. I’ll drop her off in the morning and then pick her up that night.

Anyway, B. was blowing off some steam during our conversation. She has a 13 year old boy living with her and I can tell it is getting to her a little. One problem was over a haircut. He has a style that I call “Hockey Hair”. It is a very popular style where I live. Boys grow their hair about shoulder length and it is all pushed forward. It is usually topped off with a carefully angled cap. Although these kids think it looks pretty tough and cool, they often appear like the Dutchboy paint can kid. It just looses something with the angelic face!

B. took this kid for a haircut and she wanted to be able to see his face. Apparently, an argument ensued and they finally reached a compromise where he can keep the look but it can’t be over his eyes. Ever. Next stop is the summer crew cut!

So B. was saying to me that she feels like she will be raising kids for the rest of her life. She was also watching her granddaughter last weekend and I think she was feeling stressed and a little unappreciated.

She let out a sigh and said, “I suppose this is my punishment for losing you”.

I thought about that statement for a long while…  

 

Texas Oil Country.

I have been debating again trying to contact the woman in Baytown, Texas who had been married to my birth father. The last letters I sent were returned because I wasn’t using her trailer number. As you may remember, I managed to get a couple of letters to her because I had received a late night phone message.  I have attempted to call her back on numerous occasions but had no response.

For some reason, I looked her up again yesterday and her trailer number is now appearing with her address. I am not sure how (or if) I should proceed…

In my past research, I had “googled” her address and found page after page of information. Police reports, letters to editors with complaints about the conditions in this particular trailer park, and it just goes on and on. Apparently, this park is the Baytown epicenter of some pretty serious drug dealing, fighting and public intoxication arrests. I am also curious what exactly “financial irresponsibility” entails and how you can be arrested for that. Is that similar to vagrancy? 

While I find it slightly frightening, I am also completely intrigued. This morning I thought of calling the Baytown police to try to get more information on the park itself. I think if I explained why I was interested, they might be helpful. Or maybe not. I do realize Texas is a very different place then Massachusetts.

“It was a hard land, and it bred hard men to hard ways.” — Louis L’Amour

 From what I can gather, Baytown is the heart of oil country which would explain why my biological father was there. My other concern is how things were left when he headed down to Austin. She is still using his last name and I can’t find any record of a divorce.

I am also hesitant after my experiences with the rest of his family. I am delving into a lot of  ”bad dirt” and it has blown up on me in the past.

I need to decide if learning about his later life is worth getting involved. How far should I go?   

 

Keep on Dancin’ (80’s Style!) Part II.

I am officially old. This I know to be true after my big night out at the Cape Cod Melody Tent seeing Blondie’s Parallel Lines 30th Anniversary Tour. It was…awesome!

At 46, I was slightly younger than most of the audience. I didn’t come of age until 1980 and Blondie really hit their stride in the discos of the late 70’s. Don’t get me wrong. A lot of people were about my age and there were even a couple of young “Goth” kids roaming around.

After a lot of arguing, I ended up driving. We stopped at a restaurant and then made our way over to the tent. As we walked up, I could see a couple of big, expensive looking tour buses humming away in the parking lot right next to the tent. It never occurred to me that Blondie would use tour buses…I guess I pictured them using fancy hotels and limos.  

We found our seats quickly which were excellent. A  lady next to us apologized in advance and told us she would be dancing a lot. That was fine with all of us! She was thrilled that we were totally into it.

There was a lot of confusion about if there was going to be an opening band. Nothing in print listed one but the nice older lady taking tickets said she thought there was.

Well, I have to tell you I found my new favorite band. They are from LA and called Miss Derringer and the best description I found describes them as “Goth-Western-Murder-Ballad-a-Go-Go”. From the minute they went on, I was hooked. Who wouldn’t love an opening song titled “Click, Click, Bang, Bang”? I leaned over to my friend (who is an aficionado of all things David Chase and HBO’s Sopranos) and said I could totally picture this music in a Soprano’s episode or a movie. His response was “David Chase would love this stuff”.

Anyway, the acoustics were weird so we couldn’t hear the name of the band. They did mention they would be selling CD’s and signing stuff outside the tent afterwards so I ran outside to see if I could find out who they were. As I was hunting around, the band came out and walked right by me. I knew I loved them even more…the look, the sound, it was all there! I really think they will be big.

There was a line of people waiting for the signing so I finally went up to some guy to look at his CD. He was nice enough to tell me the band’s name but he was a little on that creepy, stalker side of music fan-dom. I sometimes worry about the security in these smaller summer venues…retirees looking to make a few extra bucks mostly. They can barely wrestle a drunk to the ground so what if something really bad happened?

So yesterday I went to the band’s site to check them out and then bought three of the songs on Itunes. “Click, Click, Bang, Bang” wasn’t to be found so I emailed the band. I got a nice email back saying that song was coming out on their next CD.  I will keep my eyes open.

Blondie was just great. Someone told me Deborah Harry is 63!  She looks great and never sounded better. Most importantly, she seemed to be having a great time. I do have to say the revolving stages at Cape Cod Melody Tent (and the South Shore Music Circus) are totally annoying. Miss Derringer was fine because they pretty much stay put but Deborah Harry was all over the place. I know singers and actors will often pick an audience member to focus on but how do you do that if the room is slowly spinning? Ugh!

Yesterday was a total rest day. Tylenol, water and a big nap. I do sometimes miss the old days but Friday night sure took me right back.

I was laughing about the comments on the last post. I remember being eighteen in Boston in the early 80’s. It was a great time for the club and music scene. The Channel, Spit, Axis, The Paradise…there was someplace to go every night of the week. I worked part time as a part-time bank teller and dreaded pulling Saturday duty. It was only three hours but it was a killer when you were hungover!