I spoke with B. last week. Her grandson is now living with her. The state decided it was best for all involved if he not live with his mother at this time. It isn’t that she doesn’t love him but her love of heroin is stronger.
I am going up Tuesday to golf with my paternal uncle or ”the other side of the equation” as we call it. After lunch, I am headed over to B.’s and she asked me to stay over. I was planning on it until I found out my dog is having surgery that day. She has a weird little bump on her elbow that needs to come off. I’ll drop her off in the morning and then pick her up that night.
Anyway, B. was blowing off some steam during our conversation. She has a 13 year old boy living with her and I can tell it is getting to her a little. One problem was over a haircut. He has a style that I call “Hockey Hair”. It is a very popular style where I live. Boys grow their hair about shoulder length and it is all pushed forward. It is usually topped off with a carefully angled cap. Although these kids think it looks pretty tough and cool, they often appear like the Dutchboy paint can kid. It just looses something with the angelic face!
B. took this kid for a haircut and she wanted to be able to see his face. Apparently, an argument ensued and they finally reached a compromise where he can keep the look but it can’t be over his eyes. Ever. Next stop is the summer crew cut!
So B. was saying to me that she feels like she will be raising kids for the rest of her life. She was also watching her granddaughter last weekend and I think she was feeling stressed and a little unappreciated.
She let out a sigh and said, “I suppose this is my punishment for losing you”.
I thought about that statement for a long while…
June 28, 2008 at 11:06 am
Wow. That statemetn can be read many many ways. I wonder if the state or others are providing any additional support/guidance to B. She will need a break sometime, some help. I dont know how old she is (I am assuming if you are 45 she is at least 60). AS a side note, its a wonderful thing B is doing keeping the boy in his family and not losing him to strangers. I am sure that thought occurred to her at some point.
My best wishes for B.
June 28, 2008 at 11:12 am
My punishment for losing you! Im going to have to get back to this one. I dont think I like this ball game.
No doubt, She is overwhelmed! Raising a 13yr old is not an easy job and who else can we give him to? The stage of guilt is starting to overflow of course you are still thinking about this. “Said the spider to the fly”
Dysfunction: generation to generation and the kid is on a scribbled page.
A white marble slab and a glorified title of my Punishment for what I did to you. Your turn!!!
Dan: I just want to hug you right now.